Thursday, March 31, 2011

Rule #769

Life should be fun.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Rule #768

Putting something together almost always takes more time than you think it will.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Rule #767

Snoozing for an hour is a bad way to start your day.

Monday, March 28, 2011

Rule #766

A new keyboard is a wonderful thing.

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Rule #765

No one will ever spend money just to let people know something is free.

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Rule #764 (End of Rapper Guest Week)

Rapper Guest Rule #7 (from Jay-Z):

If you don't like my lyrics you can press fast forward.

Friday, March 25, 2011

Rule #763

Rapper Guest Rule #6 (from Flobots):

I can ride my bike with no handlebars.

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Rule #762

Rapper Guest Rule #5 (from Vanilla Ice):

Turn off the lights and I'll glow.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Rule #761

Rapper Guest Rule #4 (from Outkast):

Ain't nobody dope as me; I'm dressed so fresh, so clean.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Rule #760

Rapper Guest Rule #3 (from Sugarhill Gang):

What you hear is not a test--I'm rappin' to the beat.

Monday, March 21, 2011

Rule #759

Rapper Guest Rule #2 (from Kanye West):

You wait a couple months then you gon' see you'll never find nobody better than me.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Rule #758 (Beginning of Rapper Guest Week)

Some of you might be surprised to know that I quite enjoy rap. I'll do my best not to say something embarrassingly white here, but you know the drill*:

Rapper Guest Rule #1 (from Snoop Dogg):

When the pigs try to get at ya, park it like it's hot.

*Links this week are very likely to contain profanity, so if you have delicate sensibilities (or just hate rap) I'd avoid clicking them.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Rule #757

Hollywood hates moral ambiguity almost as much as it loves happy endings.

Friday, March 18, 2011

Rule #756

Fanboys (and girls) come in all shapes and sizes.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Rule #755

Be wary of machines that try and do your thinking for you.

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Rule #754

Haters gonna hate.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Rule #753

Beware the ides of March.

Monday, March 14, 2011

Rule #752

You have to celebrate Pi Day if your wife is a math teacher.

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Rule #751

The worst of situations can often bring out the best in people.

Friday, March 11, 2011

Rule #749

Sometimes rules have to be broken to say what you want to say.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Rule #748

Some activities (such as motorcycle racing, extreme sports, and dare-deviling) are logarithmic in the amount they increase how cool you are. Other activities (such as martial arts, marksmanship, and artistic ability) are exponential in the amount they increase how cool you are.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Rule #747

Giving up something you love (even if it's only temporary) is never easy.

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Rule #746

When it's car vs. brick wall, the brick wall may take a beating, but it's always going to win.

Monday, March 7, 2011

Rule #745

Pacemaker or not, you probably shouldn't be allowed to portray Darth Vader if you've never seen Star Wars.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Rule #744

Waking up before the sun isn't easy, but is also occasionally necessary.

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Rule #743

Only bend space/time when it's absolutely necessary.

Friday, March 4, 2011

Rule #742

There are always too many or too few good movies in theaters at any given time.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Rule #741

It's hard to tell the difference between a celebrity who's actually crazy and one who just wants attention.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Rule #740

A MacBook doesn't make you Andy Warhol.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Rule #739

Time spent is time you never get back.