Monday, October 31, 2011

Rule #983

There's nothing quite as wonderful for Evil Wanderer as the look on a child's face when you run out of candy on Halloween.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

Rule #982

Putting teenagers in masks with leafblowers in a corn maze doesn't really make it any scarier.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Rule #981

Some things just won't seem to disappear, even after the hype has died down.

Friday, October 28, 2011

Rule #980

Dogs can fall asleep in positions that would break a human's spine.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Rule #979

There is a careful order of operations when using Icy Hot, using the restroom, and washing your hands.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Rule #978

Depressing rules are depressing.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Rule #977

Grief can destroy you, but only if you let it.

Monday, October 24, 2011

Rule #976

It's easy (and cheaper) to prevent fleas than it is to treat them.

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Rule #975

Getting a plumbing estimate over the phone isn't easy.

Saturday, October 22, 2011

Rule #974

There are very few reasons anyone would willingly go to Arnett, OK.

Friday, October 21, 2011

Rule #973

Superman should never wear a Thriller jacket.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Rule #972

It's possible for a show to be about fashion and psychology.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Rule #971

The only thing worse than telling corny jokes is having to tell someone else's corny jokes.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Rule #970

Death is a good thing when it brings closure.

Monday, October 17, 2011

Rule #969

Watching someone struggle to breath is a long, hard way to spend your time.

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Rule #968

Death is unpredictable.

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Rule #967

Time in a football game is even more unpredictable than time in Narnia.

Friday, October 14, 2011

Rule #966

Before you let a dog groomer give your dog a Westie cut, ask what that means.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Rule #965

Nature's fine with me as long as it stays outside.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Rule #964

The fact that people collect things doesn't make them valuable.

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Monday, October 10, 2011

Rule #962

Vomiting is a terrible way to start your day.

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Rule #961

Finding a job in ministry is a lot like finding a date to the Sadie Hawkins Dance: all you can do is find a good place to stay visible, and hope someone good picks you.

Saturday, October 8, 2011

Rule #960 (End of Conan the Barbarian Guest Week)

Conan the Barbarian Guest Rule #7:

Conan! What is best in life?

(watch video for answer and today's rule.)

Friday, October 7, 2011

Rule #959

Conan the Barbarian Guest Rule #6:

Break the neck of a wild Cimmerian bull before you call yourself strong.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Rule #958

Conan the Barbarian Guest Rule #5:

There's nothing in the universe cold steel won't cut.

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Rule #957

Conan the Barbarian Guest Rule #4:

Let me live deep while I live.

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Rule #956

Conan the Barbarian Guest Rule #3:

When I cannot stand alone, it will be time to die.

Monday, October 3, 2011

Rule #955

Conan the Barbarian Guest Rule #2:

Mount and follow me to Hell.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Rule #954 ( Beginning of the Conan the Barbarian Guest Week)

By Crom! If you are weak, flee in fear, for this week on the rule blog belongs to Conan the Barbarian.

Conan the Barbarian Guest Rule #1:

Civilized men are more discourteous than savages because they know they can be impolite without having their skulls split.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Rule #953

Sometimes it's all in your head.