Saturday, April 30, 2011

Rule #799 (End of Why Dogs Are Man's Best Friends Week)


Why Dogs Are Man's Best Friends Rule #7:

Because they don't train seeing-eye cats or rescue cats.

Friday, April 29, 2011

Rule #798


Why Dogs Are Man's Best Friend Rule #6:

They can scare off intruders and loneliness.

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Rule #797


Why Dogs Are Man's Best Friends Rule #5:

They're not cats.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Rule #796


Why Dogs Are Man's Best Friends Rule #4:

Dogs don't care if you blame them for your farts.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Rule #795



Why Dogs Are Man's Best Friend Rule #3:

Men don't dress dogs up in ridiculous outfits.

Monday, April 25, 2011

Rule #794


Why Dogs Are Man's Best Friends Rule #2:

They'll help you clean.

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Rule #793 (Beginning of Theme Month & Why Dogs Are Man's Best Friends Week)


It's time for another theme month, and, to celebrate my coming initiation into dog ownership this weekend, I'm kicking it off with a week of rules about why dogs are man's best friend.

Why Dogs Are Man's Best Friends Rule #1:

Dogs are loyal.

Saturday, April 23, 2011

Rule #792


Fixing things makes you feel like a man.

Friday, April 22, 2011

Rule #791


Picking out names for a puppy is pretty fun.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Rule #790


Rule #789 does not come with a money-back guarantee.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Rule #789


Washing your flash drive isn't that big of a deal. It'll probably still work.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Rule #788


A television show less than a month away from the series finale shouldn't be showing filler episodes.

Monday, April 18, 2011

Rule #787


Your average adult male can't kill an ostrich (or a llama) with his bare hands.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Rule #786


While people who affirm your own position don't make you any better, they can certainly make you feel better.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Rule #785


There are legitimate reasons for a 23 year-old man to have a small spoon collection.

Friday, April 15, 2011

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Rule #783


The simplest things can make your day so much better.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Rule #782


Wikipedia is the greatest source of knowledge in the world [citation needed].

Monday, April 11, 2011

Rule #780


Everything delicious is bad for you.

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Rule #779


Eternal vigilance is the price of cleanliness.

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Rule #778


Happiness is a worn pun.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Rule #777


The internet often takes things too far.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Rule #776


It's possible to ruin someone's day from hundreds of miles away.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Rule #775


Speak out however you can long enough and eventually someone has to hear you.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Rule #774


How thinly-veiled criticism is depends on who is receiving it.

Monday, April 4, 2011

Rule #773


Fear of future repercussion keeps society polite.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Rule #772


Without actions backing them up, kind words feel insincere.

Saturday, April 2, 2011

Rule #771


Being excited about purchasing a lawn mower can make you feel way too grown-up.

Friday, April 1, 2011

Rule #770


Not having a rule until the next day counts as an April Fool's Day prank.