Rule #877

If you're willing to spend $175 on a dog bed, you need to reevaluate the way you spend money.

Rule #767

Snoozing for an hour is a bad way to start your day.

Rule #648

Sleeping on an air mattress is better than sleeping on plywood.

Rule #554

Never underestimate the value of a quality mattress.

Rule #501

Always make sure you get out of bed before you turn your alarm off.

Rule #381

Satin sheets, though soft, are far too slippery.

Rule #341

It can be difficult to adjust to sleeping in the same bed as someone else.

Rule #11

True love is being able to kiss someone who has morning breath.